Give up not

I felt like giving up.. I felt I have no more aim, no more direction, no more purpose in life..
I felt that whatever I do, they will be no more purpose...
Not to only give up on my studies, but also evrything.. I wanted to give up everything..
But when I think twice,I feel that things wouldn't change eventhough if Im giving up...
In fact, things might become worse..
Maybe not now, but in future, I am sure I willl regret like anything if I give up now... I do things follow my mood... My mood nice, evrything goes well, my mood not nice, I give up everything...

People around can't stand me also at times, but im sorry, I cannot control myself.. I may look cheerful as i used to be, happy like nothing happen on the outside, but deep down in my heart, I am not... I felt very helpless, although people offer to help, but still Im not satisfied.
I don't know why..

Outsiders may think I am a useless girl, a playful girl, a-dun-like-2-study-girl, oweys-like-to-depend-on-people-girl... But who are you to think and judge me like that?? How much or how deep u all know my inner thoughts?
How u noe what am I thinking? My attutude, my character, my actions, how much you all know? my independent side, my useful side, my studying look, you all never see it before..
Im just a simple person, n leads a simple life... so... why? wana makes my life miserable ?


Life is full of suffering, I understand... Life is not a bed of roses, I know...

giving up not,
carolynwong